Feeling Overwhelmed?

We have all at one time or another felt overwhelmed.  It most often happens when we have over committed, over scheduled, and underestimated the time in our days.  I do not find myself overwhelmed by many things. I believe this is the result of careful planning and learning to say NO!, but today was different.


As a home school mom, who was also a home school student I have found my teaching style to be organized and lax at the same time.  I have a plan and on most days it is executed flawlessly, but on other days you could set off fireworks inside my house and I wouldn't notice because all hell was breaking loose anyway. On those days I think back to when I had two toddlers, cutting, coloring, and pasting letters in their always neat notebooks. My motto was "a place for everything and everything in its place."  Well those days are long gone.  I now have two toddlers, two elementary students, and one middleschooler. No longer is it OK to just focus on our ABC's, no now we do fractions, and giant spelling words, and science project too big to fit on the table.  Don't get me wrong, I am having fun, but the responsibility I have weighs heavy on my shoulders.  My son recently decided he wants to attend West Point.  My thoughts...WOW, can I get him there? In actuality it shouldn't matter what my kids want to be or do when they grow up, it is still my job to give them the best education possible.  And I must remember, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."


Even though I believe God is my strength I was dejected when I walked to my office/library this morning to find I really had know idea what books I wanted to use next school year (or where to find them on my shelves or files for that matter). We plan to start next month, August, take one month off for a cross country vacation, resume in October-November, off for December (our focus in Dec. is Christmas cooking, crafts, visiting, gift making), In January we will be welcoming a new baby (amount of school work accomplished ~ unknown), by February we should be ready to tackle the books until summer. As I type I can't help but wonder what has me stressed, but I know it is the question of what books, what subjects, which worksheets, copywork, Bible, lapbook, what to grow, what to build, etc.  Normally I wouldn't think twice, but this year I feel compelled to reach out for help in the form of a curriculum, Yes, I said it, this classical mom is buying curriculum. Even though I already have books a plenty on the shelves adequate for teaching any grade level.  The curriculum is for me, my sanity.  I need someone else to tell me what to do and when. I found one today and have purchased most of the books needed to compliment the study.  I am excited and look forward to the month ahead that it will take to familiarize myself with the approach and texts used.  It cost more then I have ever spent in one year, but I know many of the books will be used again and the cost will be spread out over many years.  It took all day to complete the orders as there are a lot more books involved then I originnaly thought, but I feel good about the decision, my husband supports the decision, and I just might sleep a little better tonight knowing I am on my way to a happy, easier school year. 


So rather than feeling overwhelmed, I feel relieved, thankful, fully trusting in God to work through me as I teach my kids.  I know that not everyday will be perfect, but I pray we learn from our mistakes, pick up the broken pieces and set our feet on a new path the next day. Remembering "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phil. 4:13
Jenny






for info on my curriculum purchase www.easyclassical.com

Father's Day Memories

A few days before Father's day I was listening to the car radio and the DJ on a favorite station was talking about gifts for dad.  She stated that what most father's want is not the latest electronic gadget or tie, but to know they are respected by their children.  


I know at times in our home I do not always show my husband respect and there is a trickle down effect with our children.  I have been bothered by this and realize the only one who can change this is me.  I am working on it!  Ephesians 5:22
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.

I must remind myself daily that I should be an example to my family and lead my children in the way they should respect their father. Colossians 3:20

Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. 

After hearing the radio DJ, I decided that for our gift to dad the kids would write what he means to them. The younger ones would draw a picture of something they loved doing with dad. These gifts were presented to my husband and I believe he was overwhelmed by the words. The kids enjoyed doing it and it was a great reminder of how great our dad is!!! 

Friday's Funny

Teaching Younger Women

Titus 2:3-5 ~ Women who have studied the Word will know that this passage speaks to women and the roles the older play in the lives of the younger. I consider myself in the latter category, but last week as I read a post by one of my favorite bloggers, Anne Elliot, I realized that is fast changing.


And so over the past few days I have been contemplating this change and wondering what it means for me and my role in the lives of younger women. I do not think of myself as an older woman, full of wisdom, and ready to advise ( that's what my mom is for!). But I am acutely aware that I am older than many of the women I encounter daily. I have had opportunities and experiences that have aged me, one being having 5 children and one on the way.  I sat in the doctors office yesterday and was very aware that I had 10 to 15 years on many of the women in the waiting room.  


I realize that if I truly desire to be a woman whose worth is "far above rubies" Prov. 31:10b, than I must seek out ways to show the younger mom the right path.  Ann Elliot is her post noted that because she still had young children in her home she was not yet fully responsible for the role of older women and still mostly fell into the younger category. But  as our world screams negative messages to mothers, we as Christian moms need to step up, even if we feel too young. Moms are under attack and they are being left on their own to decide what is right or how to accomplish a "mom task."  We are allowing young moms to influence each other and that leads to something like the "blind leading the blind."  As I write this I am struck by the many things I  have seen recently that are appalling to me, but seem normal because the young moms of today haven't been taught what is right. For instance,


I was at a home party the other night.  You know how they work, a hostess invites you to her home, serves you food with the intent that you buy whatever product that she happens to be trying to sell.  Anyone invited to a home party should feel obligated to buy something, anything, if they show up. Well, the other night I was in attendance at this party, I had arrived on time and was surprised when after 15 minutes the hostess said she was still expecting 8 people.  Those 8 arrived en mass, late.  They were invited  to help themselves to the food (which happened to be the item for sale), which they did.  We then listened to the salesperson give a short talk about the product, invite us to ask any questions, and then we were given catalogues to shop.  I immediately began shopping, but noticed that those women who had arrived late dashed back to the table of food.  Then made their way to the other room and stayed there socializing, talking about their babies, toddlers, diets, husbands...etc., until the salesperson packed up her stuff and left. They never opened the catalogue and none placed an order. Some said they would shop from home (maybe they did, i don't know) but their behavior was so offensive. I left the party quite disturbed and totally fed up with this "new thinking generation." I call it selfish behavior.


Thinking on this for a few days, I know that to be angry or upset with these women is not what God has in mind.  I am to hold then to a higher standard while showing them that standard in my own life. Loving then, desiring to show the right ways through God's Word, praying for them, teaching them, guiding them. Not always an easy job, but one I know that as a women of God I am called to do. And I will devote myself to doing what is good.  I will still look up to the older women in my life, but as I transition into that role myself I will seek the wisdom of God and allow him to use me in any way. Because I believe I can make a difference.  I believe that women can be taught, but I must be gentle and kind.  And above all else pray that God will give me a love for them that is not of our myself. 


~Heavenly Father, Help me to grow in You that I might truly make a difference in this world.  Thank you for those moms that you put in my life, those I know and the strangers I encounter daily.  Help me to see the needs and recognize what role I might play in their life.  Help me to also remember that I am still learning and must seek out council from the older women in my life.  But above all else help we to look for the daily reminders that you are leading me, guiding my feet on the path You have set before me.  Help me to keep my eyes on You that I might not fall.  Thank you for loving me and walking with me. Amen

New Life

He died February 2011, Elijah, a fun, rambunctious, precious lollipop loving 2 1/2 year old. He wandered from his room at nap time and was later found in the family swimming pool. The gaping hole he left words can not describe, the pain and questions that assail his family are at times to hard to see and painful to watch. Why horrible things happen to good people is the question that swims in the minds of those who know this family. But God did not change that day. The world as we knew it came crashing down, but God was still the same at the end of that horrible day. Bad things happen everyday as a result of this world we live live in and the choices we make, but when they hit your world you sit up and take notice.

The morning started so beautifully. Brad and I loaded up our pressure washer and the kids and headed to Grace's house to wash the porch and driveway. It was a fun Saturday morning and we finished just after lunch and headed home. We stopped at a thrift store on the way home and bartered with the salesman for a deal on a beautiful (but in need of work) cabinet. $25.00 and 1 cabinet later we headed home. As we drove I thought how perfect the day was. I had my family close working for the good of someone else, a new cabinet to make over, things seemed so great. I did not know the tragedy that would change all that.

Hours later I stood watching the helicopter take Elijah to Orlando for more specialized care, he died there the next day, and with his death also died my view of life.

In my December post, I wrote a prayer and referenced how fragile life is. I had no idea. I can not even imagine living with the hole, losing my own child would leave. I have watched Elijah's family move on. Their world is so very different now, but they have survived. Maybe they don't see it the same way as those of us looking in, but they are strong. It has been a year and they have since welcomed a new baby Simon Elijah into their family. He is precious, he is healing, he belongs. I held him the other night and in his precious face I saw God's love in a deep way.

In this last year many things have changed, one my ability to write this blog. Words would not come. I felt that I had to write about Elijah's death becasue it changed so much for me, but I could not do it. Two, I learned to pray and trust God in an altogether new way. A way that still boggles my mind and can only be described as blind trust. Through the tears that clouded my vision I could only see my God's hand and I could hear Him telling me to just be still and know that I am God. And so I am learning to trust Him in a new way because it is the only way I know to survive this pain of this life. But joy comes in the morning. And for me it came in the form of my cabinet, (the one that needed work?). It sat on my porch and taunted me for months. It was as if it was saying, "you thought you had your perfect little life all figured out, well boy were you wrong." I hated that cabinet until one day I decided to tackle it. I scraped it and sanded it and painted it. It still has a broken glass pane but in time that will also be repaired. It has been my pool cabinet on the porch through the fall and winter. The paint has chipped a little giving a weather look, (kind of like my life), but it has found a home on my porch and fits well. I think of Elijah when I see it and now it makes me smile. But little did I know that God was not done using that cabinet to teach me life lessons.

I took my coffee out to the porch last month and saw two sparrows flying in and out of my cabinet, that afternoon a took my vaccuum and cleaned away their attempts at making thier nest inside my cabinet. I thought I was successful until last week when I saw the sparrow fly back in. There is a silk plant on the shelf inside and of course the glass pane is still missing so the bird was able to build another nest that I could not see. I was mad until I heard little chirps and then all at once my heart softened as I peered into the nest at three baby birds hungry for breakfast. It was as if God was saying to me "I am giver of life, I give and I take away" to which my heart cried out, " blessed be Your Name!"

I still do not understand why Elijah is not here with us, but I will not question God or allow the hurt to cause me to take my eyes off Him, because I would rather live a thousand days of pain with God, than one fine day without Him.

I rest in the knowledge that I will once again see the sticky face of Elijah and we will rejoice in the presence of our God together.

See ya soon, "Weeble" Love Miss Jenny