Our Little Girls

I just read an email from one of my daughter's friends tonight. She is a few months older which puts her at 10 1/2 years old. The email sounded like it was written by a teenager, with a lot of hey girl and whatcha up 2, kind of stuff. Maybe I am old fashioned, but what ever happened to the innocence of little girls. Maybe I am overly sensitive to all this because of the fact that I am watching my own daughter grow up far too quickly and find that she is often influenced by a culture that encourages little girls to act more like teens. Or maybe I want better for our girls than they are receiving.

I read an interview today in Christianity Today. The interviewee was James Dobson. My hero. I love this man as if he were my own father. I put great stock in his opinion and was raised on his books and seek to follow his advice with my own children. His new book Bringing Up Girls has just been published. In the interview he was asked how culture, technology and stereotypes effect how girls are brought up. He spoke many times how our culture is moving toward greater sexual expression. My heart sank when I read those words for I realized at once how this has become true even in our home.

Turn on any TV program and you are in some way bombarded by this message of sexuality being cool. I don't know about you , but there is nothing cool about a 10 year old feeling the need to be sexy! And yet whether they see it or not our girls are being forced to grow up faster than they deserve. The message is thrust upon them in subtle ways, ie.. Disney Channel shows, the Twilight books, the clothes they buy (my personal favorite..booty shorts with all the words on the butt), they are told skinny is better, they listen to music sung by child Pop Stars about lost relationships and love gone bad...and so on.

Now before I get ahead of myself, let me say this. My daughter watches TV, she owns an iPod, she likes funky clothes, she uses email, etc. But she also loves to play with Barbies and Matchbox cars. She likes to cut and color cardboard boxes and make them into houses and forts. There is a healthy balance that can be achieved in allowing the world into your home and into the life of your daughter, without having it dictate her life or rob her of her innocence.

As moms it is our job to protect our little girls as they grow into womanhood. They are precious beings, flowers that need careful tending. They need to know that God created them unique and beautiful. How easy it would be to get caught up in the emotions of raising girls that we miss the opportunity to teach valuable lesson of self-worth, purity, and submission. (YES, I said submission. And purity! So sue me, I want the best possible for my girl!) But, alas the road is often paved with emotional outbursts, moodiness and a good case of the grouchies! When I was growing up we were not allowed to exhibit these unfavorable qualities and much to my satisfaction (and that of my husband) it has proven to have a lovely outcome. Emotions have a place, but they must not be allowed to rule superior in our lives. Moms need a plan for dealing with outbursts and need to keep in control of the situations as they arise. Moms and girls get along much better if there is open communication and a clear concise understanding that we are the authority over our girls, not their best friends. Friendship can come later, and if you do it right during the pre-teen and teen years, it most assuredly will come.

I think about 6 to 8 years from now and what I want for my daughter. I want her to be a woman who seeks after God. I want her to know her own mind and stand up for what she believes. I want her to be sexually pure and praying for a husband who will cherish the gift she will give to him. I want her above all to know that we love her and that God loves her, and that she matters and that God has a special design for her life.